"Undermining my electoral viability since 2001."

San Francisco Night

It's up an down, this city. After a long long week of work work work, I kick back with Molly the old friend and roommate and her student cadre. Art school kids, priceless company; talking communes and cutting hair and playing music late after a turkey feast. I got lost on my way over, climbed a few hills I didn't need to. But no matter, the exercise is good. Ditoto on the way home with a head full of red wine, certainly lendeding a maniac edge to the downhill capers and a kind of grim solderly attitude to the climbs.

One lady pulled over to ask if everything was kosher -- me taking up a whole lane with my swerving -- so I had to explain how crosscutting makes a steep hill easeir to climb. The best was near the peak, cutting on a long shallow downhill grade and letting go of the handlebars, looking up at the giant radio towers and feeling the closeness of the streets, the sea-tinged divinity in the breeze.

Once I had a girl on rocky top,
half bear the other half cat,
wild as a mynx but sweet as soda pop
I still dream about that

I used to listen to that blazing little bluegrass ditty projing over the w-burg bridge in the late spring sun; a golden time back east. After a night -- a week -- of pushing hard here in the Bay it makes me think of all the people I love and miss back in Brooklyn, of Nick and his old-world W.C. Fields vaudville senabilities, of Julia and her balsy comic truth, of Frank and Jeremy and Alex and Wes and Kev and John and Joe and the thing that is the Meek, of Sasha, of Brendon and Sarah and Brandy and Carrie and Archie and Hugo and the rest of the friendly faces at the lyric, of Emily and Kate and Chris Kam and Frank Boudreaux and Christine and all the people I aught to have seen more often.

I seem to have traded a life of great social comport and little substantive purpose for something approaching the polar opposite. I'm just observing, not complaining. For the moment it's contrast, that grand and holy waltz which is the essence of life. I notice things. I learn. I grow. This is good.

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In The Grand Old Fashion

I've planned to blog in the grand old fashion tonight. Make up for sparse presence the past few weeks. I've been reading Tropic of Cancer and marveling and how little I knew about the history of American writing. Discovering Henry Millar years after falling in love with Hunter S. Thompson and Kerouac and Burroughs is a bit embarassing; like introducing yourself as a stranger to a party host, late into the night and drunk and having the time of your life, feeling indeed like you belong, like you own a bit of the place.

"So this is your house?" you'd probably exclaim with some measure of mock surprise, trying to make like you didn't feel like king of the joint and you hadn't been cutting loose all about the living room. "Oh, you mean Anias Nin over there, you mean that was the love of your life..." and so on.

But the thing is, we being kindred souls and all I don't think Henry would mind.

Kindred souls. If he were around these days he'd probably get that a lot. Damn annoying too, I'd imagine, all the half-assed punks who think they measure up just because they'd slept in rough places and written a few searing journal entries.

That's a thing about me though; more often than not I assume I'm on someone's level, no matter who they are. I tend not to revere people I meet or otherwise come to feel I know. I don't know whether this is a good thing or not. Could be confidence and a desire to relate equitably, a resistance to the cult of personality. Could be pure poison hubris. Certainly leaves one hurting for role models.

A lot's been going on the past week with work and not a lot else. What with the stress and all I've been getting short with some of my co-workers, my co-worker roommate Dan in particular; our joking reparte about whether or not signing Justin Timberlake on to Music For America would be a good thing or not taking on sharp edges at times. But we're out of the worst, and I've thankfully regained consciousness of my gruffness, so things should even out. It's hard sometimes when there's no Steve Wangh to tell me I'm being an asshole.

And so I want to tell you all about the place I'm living and what -- really -- is going on inside of me, but I need to have another burbon, peruse some more tawdry whoring genius parisian-themed prose and then sleep like the dead for six hours or more. It turns out to be more of a challange to meaningfully spit content when I work at something else all day and night; I think I can make this work in any case. Too much of a habit to break now.

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Sleeping in the Office

Sleeping in the office tonight. I still set my own hours; go figure. Anyway, behold the fruits of my labor:

http://beta.musicforamerica.com

The real deal goes out sometime in the next 72 hours, but if you're so inclined go ahead and take a test drive. Check out what I'll be working on for the next year. It's going to be some exciting stuff.

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Where Have You Been?

Where have I been the past few days?

Probably at the office.

...details coming soon

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