"Undermining my electoral viability since 2001."

Six Years Later

Sadly, six years later still feels a lot like one year later:

bq. I can't help but think that a raw wound has a lot more use to those in power than a healed one, and while I don't believe that there's some vast conspiracy with malicious intent to keep the American people in a constant state of worry and fear, I do believe that's something the media does. I don't believe that Bush, Cheney and Co. are really evil people, but I do believe in the seductive power of subconscious desire, the human ability to rationalize. I certainly don't trust these people to do the right thing. They don't represent my interests or share my view of the world. They're not doing what I would do, and I don't believe in the end that they know better than me.

In some important ways things have changed. I certainly no longer feel like an island of rational dissent adrift in a sea of vengeful insanity -- that's one nice thing -- but the sense of utter frustration and resentment towards our political leadership and opinion-shaping elite persists.

On days when I think big and let myself remember, my gut feeling is still for ¡revolucion!. These morons and cowards -- and that includes most of the figureheads I will end up supporting politically, most likely -- have been fucking things up left and right for six years running, with no end in sight. They don't deal in honest public dialog and their perception of the challenges we face not only as a nation but as a motherfucking species is, frankly, retarded.

Logistically it would be nearly impossible, but I think sometimes we'd be better off cleaning the slate and starting something new. I don't believe a popular movement will form to do this anytime soon, but a slow downward spiral into the Red Dawn might, our Empire collapsing like a flan left too long in the cupboard.

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Pre-Mexico Monkey Mayhem

Well, I just lost my nice five-paragraph post, so here's the short and sweet:

  • I'm on the D concourse, looking to blow down to a glass house on the beach in baja for a week-long work retreat.
  • Mary and Ron's wedding was teh awesome. Monkey reunion makes me promise many future portland visits. Also, camping at a wedding is a cheap way to make responsibility fun. Good idea.
  • The highlight reel would include tearing my pants open on the dance floor, getting lost in the neighborhood, and cooking up some whiskey-fueled power-yenta game and convincing the beautiful young people to make out.
  • That last bit I do not recall, Senator, but I've heard it from multiple parties, including a lady who I carpooled up to Portland with who had my friend's hickey as proof. So there you have it.
  • I spent Sunday in recovery, visited my grandma and had a nice Thai dinner w/the moms, then a quick catnap, then the road.

More from Mexico, most likely.

UPDATE: I have arrived at the house of glass and all is well in the cosmos. Tecate tall boys and a little Cortez Sea skinny dip put everything right. Now we've got to get down to biznass.

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The Emergency Kisses

Headed up to a wedding in Oregon that should be better than the 10-year High School reunion I skipped. I'm feeling some comedown from the high and heady days of re-entry. Life's a grind sometimes, and loneliness is such a drag.

Haven't done any Burning Man writing to my chagrin, other than an outline and two paragraphs. I feel the moments slipping away, but trying to run my whole show this week while my Baja-based cohorts weathered Hurricane Henriette left me little mojo in reserve. I'll be joining them post-wedding for a week of retreat and grand planning, which should be interesting at least. Maybe I can get'r'dun there. I'm hoping for some nice peaceful moon and ocean action at least; rapture at sea.

Weddings, man. I love the big family party aspect, and of course I love my friends being in love and tying the knot, but they cast a long shadow too. I realized the other day that virtually all my significant non-recent lovers are married or engaged to be married (or had been married and then divorced). Maybe that speaks to my good taste, and I don't bring it up in anguish over anyone who "got away." It's just a contrast.

There's no rush, but it makes me realize yet again that finding that partner-type relationship (the one I've been talking about lo these many years) is more than a matter of finding. It's also a matter of building and growing. Trite, but true.

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Technical Difficulties

My webserver is dying a slow and painful death after several years of neglect. I need to start fresh, and I feel like renovating around these parts anyhoo. I've been enjoying the return to more personal-type writing, and I want to take that to the next gonzo level. Escape from dirtstyle and start pushing the envelope.

So, that's my way of saying there could be some downtime in the future. Possibly while I'm retreating in Mexico.

I'll make a comeback though, with more verve and sizzle than ever. Be ready to tell all your friends, k?

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