"Undermining my electoral viability since 2001."

Outlandish Josh

Published on Thu, 2007-06-07 12:48

San Fanciscan' It

I've made it down to my workaday summer outpost in the Dogpatch and my first home-away-from-home off in the Panhandle. Greeted by blue skies and sunshine. Initial city impressions:

  • Wow there are a lot of pretty girls. On the streets, in cars (presumably bars) and freight elevators even.
  • I've lost some of my nerve for fighting traffic on the bike. Those country roads and stationary machines have made me soft.
  • Or maybe it's that I haven't really been riding all that much, because these hills are harder than I remember too.
  • The living situation seems like it will work out great: nice unassuming roommate, wifi, extra-long twin bed (so my ankles don't even hang off).
  • The office hasn't been progressing too much in terms of getting fixed up. It's basically the same as it was last time I was here two months ago. That's gonna change.

After last weekend's outlaw mountain trip, I started re-re-reading Sometimes a Great Notion, which is probably one of my top 5 books, and have been slowly digesting the potential of having one foot in the city and one foot in the woods.

It intuitively feels connected to my existential crisis-of-meaning du jour, reconciling these seemingly contradictory aspects of my life. What I want is some kind of grand Hegelian synthesis: a future where my biodiesel hybrid 4x4 pickup carries me from Silicon Valley to the peaks of Trinity County in carbon-neutral style, and there's someplace in-between called "home" where the dog stays while I'm down in the city.

Is that kind of thing really even possible? It feels like maybe... it also seems logically like a bacheloresque way to roll, all that movement, or at best (see point #1 above) a "girl in every port" type of situation; but the dream includes a family of course, which begs a huge and unanswerable sea of questions, variables out of my control, etc etc etc. Hrmmm.

For now I'm happy to be here, soaking up the ambient kinetic energy of San Francisco. It may be the rambler in me, but being on the move has put my mind at ease.

Responses

Thu, 2007-06-07 17:41 — no one special

so, i was talking to my fantastic friend, jake, the other day. i've been trying to figure out this whole men vs. women thing for a little while now. why we are so differnt when it comes to romantic partnerships, and he brought up a weird point. he said that he can see a girl naked, and five minutes later not have the capability or enough imagination to remember or even fanticize what it was he saw; therefore has the urge and desire to see it again. i found this weird, because as a girl, i can look at either sex naked and not be particularily thrilled by it at all, and have a very good memory of it. plus, if i have not seen a particular person naked, i'll just make up in my own head what i think they should look like, because my odds of actually seeing that person naked are slim to none anyway (mostly due to lack of interest and knowledge that reality is usually a killer of fantacy). so, how does this tie into the girl at every port thing? i suppose it confounds me that this sort of reality would hold any interest with me, as a girl. see, if you get used to one type of person at one port, then go to a new one, wouldn't you have to get used to all those new quirks and bullshit all over again? you seem to like taking on big projects, so this may facinate you. but for me, ick, because it's not about the sex or the fantacy, or the mystery. there isn't much mystery in sex for me. you pretty much do the same thing with people on a physical level. of course it varies in intensity depending on the attraction, but it's still the basic penis in vagina thing and that's got no mystery behind it at all. we all know how that works, and it's the same every time. it's totally boring. so, if i'm attracted to one guy in particular, i guess i'd like to see him at each port i visit instead of someone else to deal with, because in the end he's going to be putting his penis in my vagina anyway.

Thu, 2007-06-07 19:50 — Outlandish Josh

To clarify, the "Girl in every port" scenario is sort of an imaginary middle-ground between remaining alone, and having an imaginary monogamous relationship that's compatible with my imaginary travel schedule. I meant it tongue-in-cheek.

And some points of disagreement: I don't agree that "it's totally boring." I think it's pretty different with different partners, and that there's a hell of a lot more to sex than penis-in-vagina. You're mileage may vary.

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