"Undermining my electoral viability since 2001."


Although I had no gig (a choice I don't regret) in yesterday's election, it was still a sort of big pivot-point for me subconsciously, one of those dates you mentally hang things around, a good arbitrary marker in time.

And so here it is the day after, and life is going to go on. Like some folks I've talked to, there's a possible sense of lightness and hope. I'm no political virgin here so I'm not expecting much (anything) to really happen in the next two years, but it's deeply heartening to win, to understand once again that this country isn't crazy, that there's always a chance for something better to happen.

It's getting me thinking about my role in all this, and my life going forward. I'm starting a company at the moment, that's my job, but I'm not really in it for the job or the paycheck or the work or the elections... I'm in it for the results, for something to happen, for change and effects and excitement (and recognition, sure) and for the prospect of a real step forward for Everyone.

Here's a quote that sticks out from the Kesey book I'm reading of late:

During the decade of our friendship we had shared a vision, a cause if you will. We were comrades in that elite though somewhat nebulous campaign dedicated to the overthrow of thought control. We dreamed of actually changing the human mind to make way for a loftier consciousness. Only from this unclouded vantage, we maintained, could humanity finally rise out of its repetitious history of turds and turmoil and realize that mighty goal of One World. One World Well Fed, Treated Fair, At Peace, Turned On, and In Tune with the Universal Harmony of the Spheres and the Eternal Everchanging Dharma of... of... Anyway, One Wonderful World.

We never claimed to know precisely when the birth of this New Consciousness would take place, or what assortment of potions might be required to initiate contractions, but as to the birthplace we had always taken it for granted that this shining nativity would happen here, out of the ache of an American labor.

I believe we're going to see some amazing changes in our lifetimes. We're going to face tremendous challenges, both from the environment around us and from ourselves, but we're also looking at huge opportunities. I truly believe we sit at the cusp of a new Rennaisance.

As usual, Samuel is right. Whether or not you have that Pentacostal vision, there's been an undercurrent of Doom, of a grim final act. And now it seems perhaps that cloud is lifting. What does it mean, this light that shines through? Where will it lead? The sky isn't the limit, you know...

And yet at the same time, let's be real. Dark things happen all around us, and dark things are on the way for sure.

A very specific for-instance. Last week a man I lived with when I was a Freshman at NYU was shot and killed on the streets of Phillidelphia, reportedly in a mugging gone wrong. Orlando, how I wish there were another way. How I wish we'd bunked when I was more who I am and not an 18-year-old wannabe artist fresh out of Oregon. Maybe it would have made a difference.

Bless you and your soul and your family. Life is holy and every moment precious. What a goddamn waste.

Yes, darkness abounds. It descends upon us from above, in dreams and accidents and misfortune, in the thoughtless passing cruelty of unknown human strangers. It bubbles from within; as fear, as hatred, as dispair, paranoia, and bitterness, averice and envy. No one is immune. There is darkness, and it is real.

But I'm not one of the Nhilists. I think that the good in us outweighs the bad, that the truth is stonger than lies. I believe that all things being equal, people -- twisted sick puppies though some may be -- all have hearts and souls, and in the end we just want Love, to give and recieve, to accept and be accepted, to build and play and share and enjoy. And I think it can work out.

You can say it's my orthodox-hippy roots showing through, and it is, but this is what I believe. It's what I have faith in, and it brings me great comfort and strength. I believe that even if it all goes horribly wrong that humanity will pull through, and that there will still be culture and community and children and laughter and love.

Anyway, the world just got more interesting for me, and probably more frightening and dark for a bunch of other people. C'est la vie. I think we're better off this way, and I intend to help prove that point. You in?


So sorry to hear about Orlando, that's just terrible.

I feel the lightness.

As someone who gets depressed in the winter, it's like the way I feel in the days after the solstice. We've passed a low point.

Damn. This is the first I'd heard about Orlando. I didn't know him very well at all, but it always makes you look at the long shadow at your feet whenever something like that happens to someone you know.