"Undermining my electoral viability since 2001."

Outlandish Josh

Published on Sat, 2007-07-07 16:33

More Sicko

Sort of a ranty post here, hence the angry gun-toting photo.

My man -- and soon to be home-owner (!!!) -- Franko had an interesting comment on his blog in response to Sicko:

I've had no illusions about how fucked up HMO's are and always just assume that I'll never get any coverage for anything. I have never, ever been totally honest with any doctor I have ever had for fear of having my honesty come back to haunt me. No doctor of mine has or will ever know that I used to smoke cigarettes, how much I drink, past drug use etc. I feel that I am always trying to game a system that would like nothing more than to game me.

This is something I'd never actually considered. Frank's the son of a Doctor so he's been on the inside his whole life. I suppose I've been more of a naive trusting optimist, and having never had any other regular doctor than Dr. Halpern, who was my pediatrician and saw me once or twice as an adult, I've always been totally honest with health care people. It's never occurred to me to do otherwise, because they're supposed to be evaluating my health, and I assume they need all the data. I also assume at some level that what I share with them is private.

This, of course, is not really how it works. The fact that we have a system which employs the profit-motive to drive denial-of-care of course does mean that people lie to their docs. This is just another example of how deeply-grooved the wrong in our system of Health Care is. It's paradigmatically perverted. Spiritually fucked.

Read More

Published on Fri, 2007-07-06 12:41

Happy Birthday 'Merika!

I just made it back from a few days out camping at a boat-in site with Mark, Zya, her sister and brother in law, all hosted by Can-Do Tiger Dave (Zya's progenitor) and his goon squad of drunken loggers. Good times. I feel that all Americans should drive a speed boat at least once every four years.

It was hot and nasty on the way back across the Sacto valley (110 and humid at the low point) but Moamar held up fine in the heat, and here in Westhaven it's fogged-in and maybe 60 degrees tops. I'll be here until Sunday when I fly to New York for a bit.

I read some news today as a way of reorienting myself. The local paper out in the Sierras was all about parade coverage and exotic police-blotter stuff (woman with sword detained, etc), and I knew that The Fear would be progressing even over a holiday weekend.

It strikes me as odd how disconnected things are. Like, the giant -imperial palace- embassy being built in Baghdad, which is news because of construction problems. What the fuck, you know? The undercurrent of doom is returning.

Never underestimate the power of inertia to keep things going, but the total lack of sanity in this country's brain-trust is kind of alarming at times. Feels like we've all just accepted that Shit's Bad, and we're just going to make the best of it for ourselves and those around us. I lump myself into that group. It's hard to know what else really to do but bide time and work on yr own life.

Read More

Source Text For "The Best I Can"

On Mon, 2007-07-02 00:05

The following are texts which I wrote leading up to the final product, [[The Best I Can]]. Frank Boudreaux had told me already about the concept for the overall show -- 10 pieces by different artists based on the 10 tracks from Kid A -- and I'd picked "Optimistic", which is my favorite Radiohead song, as the one to do.

The Best I Can

On Sun, 2007-07-01 23:54

"The Best I Can"
Text and annotation by Josh Koenig

Source texts for this piece are available "here":/wiki/source_text_best_i_can.

Originally staged 11/12/2001 as part of "RADIO/active" (produced by Frank Boudreaux) at The Cutting Room, New York City. Directed by Josh Koenig with Josh Koenig as BIKEMAN and "Johnny Nicholls":http://www.myspace.com/mrnichollsmusic as GUITAR PLAYER.

Published on Sun, 2007-07-01 23:33

He's On Fire!

So another long post, but this one because I stumbled upon an old cache of never-blogged textfiles from 2003 and before. Dynamite stuff from the archives -- like these old artistic source texts -- and some of it still topical!

Here's a bit from deep inside my mind back when I was still a Young Buck, and right before I fell in love again, it's interesting to note. Borderline arrogant, true, but that kind of free and open state of mind is something I think it would be very positive for me to reconnect with.

h4. Dancing.txt (1/27/2003)

There was dancing, and I overheard a fairly nubile 20-year-old tell some lucky chump. "I want sex. I like it. It feels good to me. I don't do it a lot, but I want someone who will give it to me now."

He seemed at first to be too much of a weify wannabe hipster/jock hybrid to step up to what she was pitching, and for a moment I entertained a fantasy of "cutting in" so to speak. She and I had been dancing somewhat in sync earlier, and lustful thoughts had been propagating for some time. But I hesitated. In the moment I became plagued with doubt; about who I was and what I was doing; about who she was and if I really wanted her; doubt about the very nature of my own desire.

During the intervening doubtful minute, the lucky chump realizes the what score is and decides he knows what to do. Soon they are gone, and thinking it over I'm not all that bothered. You see, I realized if I were going to try it with her, it would have to be something like this:

Josh: Sorry, I couldn't help but notice the proposition you just made to this gentleman, and I'd like to make my services available to you this evening, should you be so inclined. I'm good, and I'm leaving town for New York City in two days. There will be no complecations.

20-y-o: Ummm ok. [resumes talking to other guy]

[But then... 20 minutes later]

20-y-o: Ok, are you game?

Read More

Published on Sun, 2007-07-01 16:44

Haulin' Ass, Gettin' Paid

Man, I loved that little bit from Idiocracy That's what I'm talkin' about! Lol. Anyway, uhhh...

Wake up, Wake up, Wake up
It's the first of the month

Well, as alluded to below with work seeming to progress well, I've reached another milestone in my quest for financial freedom. I'm square with the tax-man, the last big fiduciary obligation. My bank account is low, but I'm free and clear of serfdom: it's all gravy from here on out!

Translated to more realistic terms, that means I'm now in the novel situation of having only low-interest consolidated student loans as debt, and consistently (reliably?) earning more a month than I need to survive.

I feel like quoting Deadwood -- Ellsworth's line -- "I’ll tell you what: I may have fucked my life up flatter than hammered shit, but I stand here before you today beholden to no human cocksucker."

Part of me wants to take this opportunity to settle things down, cut down on my bills and cut down on my work too. The hippy thing: simplifyyyyy. But I think for now this is unlikely.

I'm too ambitious for that just yet, not ready to take the "one big score and I'm out" thought into action. It seems much more likely to try to work a simplicity/tranquility component module into a more complex life. Like building a cabin on top of a mountain in Lawless Trinity County and keeping my home-base in Westhaven while holding down an apartment in the Bay. These things can be done, if I want to do them. I could also make other choices.

Freedom; terrible terrible freedom.

Giving free reign to my inner project-manager voice for a moment, let's take stock of things.

Read More

Pages