Reclaiming the Common Good:

71% of voters strongly agree that "Americans are becoming too materialistic," including 71% of Democrats, 70% of Independents, and 72% of Republicans. (92% total agree.)

68% of voters strongly agree that the "government should be committed to the common good and put the public’s interest above the privileges of the few." (85% total agree.)

73% of Democrats, 62% of Independents, and 67% of Republicans strongly agree with a common good focus for government. A similar percentage of voters (68%) strongly agree that "government should uphold the basic decency and dignity of all and take greater steps to help the poor and disadvantaged in America." (89% total agree.)

This should be the bedrock of what Public institutions are all about, and instead Bush is pushing a MF constitutional amendment (chance of happening: null) to ban gay marriage.

You know, it annoys me how Republicans get to be the family values people. What's better for a family? Not having the dudes who love eachother and live down the block get legal recognition, or having some fucking health care? Is it learning about "intelligent design" or having one parent with a job that can support the family financial so that both don't have to work full-time? Sheesh.

The second person who I love and respect in a week just complimented me on my writing but also said they don't understand some of what I blather on about. That's fair enough -- and actually I'm pretty flattered in the first place that people think all this first-draft stuff is "well written" --- but that comprehension gap is something I really want to work on.

See, I do actually know what I'm trying to say most of the time. I'm not saying I say it well, but there's an intention to communicate. I'm doing a big writing project this summer, and the goal is to make something that's quite broadly accessible, grokable by all.

So, thinking about what that might entail... one thing I'm definitely going to be doing in the future is setting up some wiki-style linkage, so that when I use obscure terminology I can link to wikipedia (as above for "grok"), and maybe to my own pages when I use something specific. Also: diagrams, pictures, charts and graphs!

It's interesting, trying to express. I'm realizing that I have my own sort of Gestalt in which I operate. It includes a lot of weird and/or disparate things that I don't think most people necessarily have rattling around in their head. All things go. All things go. But it being my Gestalt after all, I think it's worth something. It's part of what I want to capture in the old writing.

I feel like it should be possilbe to break it down into simple bits, like axioms. I used to wonder if doing this would smart myself out of a job, but now I don't worry. There will always be people who need help applying abstract knowledge to their real-world problems (this gets complex; it's often even kind of hard) and these people will always be able to hire me to help out. In the mean time, the more other people who get more capable the better for everyone.

Not that I'll be able to bring anyone enlightenment (ha!) or smarts or even useful knowledge or anything, but I can try.

Vegas here I come. Yep. Looks like I'll be teaming up with some other heads to do an all-day CivicSpace marathon on Thursday at the Yearly Kos.

Hopefully I'll have picked up a camera by then (gonna try to do that tomorrow). Should have some fun pictures if so.

Wes uncovers final proof that we must fear (fear) the menace of Persian Plutonium.

And, on a more serious note, scuttlebutt from the military types says there's a pretty good-sized arms buildup around Iran, though maybe all it really is is a way to gin up the price of oil. Hmm...

From Slashdot:

"According to CNET, Congress has set its sights on 'the purported problem of violent and sexually explicit video games.... A U.S. House of Representatives committee on consumer protection says it will hold a hearing on the topic later this month, with a focus on 'informing parents and protecting children' from the alleged dangers of those types of games.' " The article goes on to describe seven bills under consideration that either attach fines to the sales of Mature titles to children, or study "the effect of electronic media on youths." Five of them are sponsored by Democrats.

I wish they would wise up and stop. There's no political gain to be had here; quite a lot to lose actually. More importantly, there no real positive outcome in terms of increased social wellfare either. Leave it alone, you suckers.

Meanwhile, your kids can kill the heathens and insufficient believers in a Left Behind-themed shooter. No, seriously.

So, uhh... any guess who's got the better strategy here?

Just back from John and Noreen (Lavin) Yarwood's wedding. Great wedding. Beautiful cerimony and a kickass party. There was even a conclusive Journey sing-along.

What more could you ask for? Well...

Tip to sololakidan, Keelin Nelson and Whipple Newell III.

Whipple is the groom. WASPiest names ever? Could be!

Contratz, kids!

The other day after my last day of work I made the executive decision to get pretty high and take a hot shower, do some yoga, pushups, handstands, and generally stretch out my mind and body. It's kind of a ritual thing for me, similar to heavy cardiovascular exercise; helps to keep the engine running clean.

In the midst of this I encountered a hard knot of fear, which is unusual for me. I don't tend to be afraid of things -- paranoia's not my style -- but for a bit there I was grappling with some kind of deep and undeniable terror. It was a moment of weakness and confusion, debilitating even, and as I tried to relax my body and breathe through it, I also of course tried to figure out what was causing this mind-killing tension.

I'm afraid of dissapointing people, that I won't be able to live up to the expectations I create around myself. I'm afraid that I'll end up a faker, a poseur, a con. I'm afraid I won't be able to live through to my highest ideals, that lazyness and greed will drag me down. I'm afraid of wasting my life in some fruitless pseudo-bohemian masturbatory snit, and at the same time I'm afraid of "settling down" and "growing up" in conventional terms.

I believe I'm reaching a point in my life where I have to start making choices, and I worry about making the wrong ones, about writing metaphysical checks that my butt can't cash. I'm afraid that I won't be able to do it; I'm afraid of what might happen if I do.

This calls to mind that Nelson Mandella quote about how what we fear most is not that we are powerless, but that we are powerful. I think it's a little bit too glib to make much of a life philosophy, but there's a pretty sharp kernel of truth in there.

A more precise formulation for me is that I fear the responsibility that comes with the power of my agency. I do sort of believe that I can do anything, which as a younger man was quite a liberating and energizing idea to have, and one that I cherish and seek to spread. Yet as the idea becomes more and more realized -- "why yes, I can accomplish quite a lot if I put my mind to it" -- it grows more complex.

I think this is part of why people have conventional careers. Having a trail before you that's clearly marked and endorsed by your tribe eases these concerns. I don't have any such path; I'm am sort of out in the wilderness, feeling that my ability to find a way through the thick of life on some level matters, not just to me and my soul-survival, but to something greater as well.

This could well be hubris and nothing else. I don't get paranoid, but that doesn't mean I don't suffer from other problems of egocentricity. Delusions of grandeur, perhaps. My general sense though is that it's not worth second-guessing these kinds of feelings unless they're demonstraby proving themselves to be destructive, and so far my self-importance hasn't been more than annoying.

Anyway, it's not like I have a choice. I'm not gonna put on a tie and live in a cube or anything, so it's the wilderness for me, friends. Nothing to do but face this fear head on and plunge forward into the darkness.

Today was my last day of being a full time Lead Developer for Trellon LLC. I'm going to stay on in a reduced capacity to make sure that the projects I'm involved in continue to work out well, but I won't be taking on anything new unless it's special, and that would be on a contract basis. In a substantial way, my time is now my own.

This is all part of the plan to free me up for the summer. I'll be living in Westhaven, writing a thousand words a day, working on The Democrobot and generally preparing for the next cycle of activity.

It's been a nice steady run here in Park Slope. I've paid off some debts, enjoyed a quieter NYC life, had plenty of good moments, but I'm looking forward to jumping out of the comfey little rut I've made. I'm looking forward to trying to stake a new career claim. I'm looking forward to getting creative, to getting more physical exercise, to getting out into nature a bit.

Plenty of whacky internet adventures to come. Stay tuned for all the excitement.

Digby:

What we do about Islamic fundamentalism is a topic we must deal with. I suspect that it will take a global effort and a willingness to deal intelligently with the impending global oil crisis. There will be other challenges as well, including potential wars and regional strife and any of the other things that have marked civilization from the beginning. All peoples must deal with such things.

But there is no war on terrorism. The nation is less secure because of this false construct. We are spending money we need not spend, making enemies we need not make and wasting lives we need not waste in the name of something that doesn't exist. That is as politically incorrect a statement as can be made in America today. But it's true.

It's a lie and a scam and a sham and a show, but it's a meal-ticket a lot of lazy fatbacks are riding, and which a lot of paranoid juicers are drawing power from. It'll be right hard to get rid of.

Our national leadership class is remarkably small and entrenched. They resist change and it's much easier to stop things than to start them. Yeah, the Democratic party is getting an infusion of new blood, and that's all good, but the revolution isn't really happening in any meaningful way.

Maybe we'll get healthcare though. That'd be nice.